2017-06-14 Father's Day

Father’s Day, as a complement to Mother’s Day, has always been a vastly different holiday.

For one, and I’ve mentioned it plenty of times before, my own father has been gone for a decade. I have other male relatives in similar positions, uncles, a grandfather, even other men who have acted as almost surrogate fathers to me, but my own biological father hasn’t been in the picture for years. That sort of absence puts a different sort of spin on the holiday. I don’t want to downplay the roles that any other guys have had in my life, I appreciate them tremendously. Still, it just isn’t quite the same.

Beyond that, I myself have been a father for now 4 years. I could never be a mother (obviously), so Father’s Day is more personal to me. Not that I’d want to latch onto it as celebrating me, I feel like that’s entirely too narcissistic. But I feel like it serves to make me evaluate myself, and whether I’m being the best father that I can be for my kids. I’m not perfect, no parent is, but I genuinely want to do right by my children. Father’s Day is a day where I can ask myself, am I really doing everything that I can to be a good father? What can I do better, where can I improve? Obviously, this isn’t something you should limit to a single day of the year, but it is a day where I am more pointedly reminded to.

Even though I mention my own biological father, I do have great respect for step-fathers and adoptive fathers that take care of their kids. You didn’t have to raise your kids, you chose to. That’s something worth noting. Being a father is no small task, so to take that responsibility on speaks highly of someone’s character.

This Father’s Day, be cognizant of the fathers in your life. We’re not perfect, but most of us are doing what we can to look out for our kids. For the first time fathers, congratulations and enjoy the ride. You’re going to make mistakes, but be sure to learn from them.